Tuesday, April 16, 2002

I kind of miss the way things used to be.. so simple... I just realized that I've gone completely craxy.. I feel like shit a lot.. not sure ... I don't like it at all. of course. and you know what i'm talking about. i know you know and i know you know i know you know i know.. so it all works out right? well, maybe not. you know yesterday my mom told me that i should just go for my goal and write a book. i really want to.. but at the same time.. how would i ever get published... she doesn't realize that my latest poems and stories have been so down hearted and just plain angry or sad. i suppose that i should write something like.. up beat or something like that...
ya, so now, it's um.. what? like.... wow.... a long time from then that's for sure! let me update you! I am queen bitch now... I am going out with Anthony, who i can see myself honestly marrying... and having his children. I love him with all my heart.. yet I still talk with EriK... yes... i'm no good. I'm a bad person, but we all live and get on with things right? I don't want to be the reason he is upset. I want him to feel good. I dunno what I'm doing I'll have to figure something out! AND SOON!

Tuesday, January 08, 2002

erik and i are no longer....
I'm going out with reno now... i'm so confused though.. i miss james.

Wednesday, November 07, 2001

i started a blog for erik and myself... it's going to be fun.. i'm going to work on it all night i think....
*giggles* yeah, i'm weird. la la .. ba ab.
damn this! i just wrote a fucking long ass entry and it's gone.... just fucking great.. that puts me in a great mood... damn it all to hell i say... naw.. but i'm still pissed!
my eyes burn... I cried last night... scott made me realize soo much.. I'm not sad... i'm not depressed... just jealous. i like erik a lot.. i think that he is adorable... and so sweet to me.. i love talking to me.

Tuesday, November 06, 2001

That Sam-I-am. That Sam-I-am. I do not like that Sam-I-am. Do you like green eggs and ham? No I do not like them Sam-I-am. I do not like green eggs and ham.
wow.... i'm so.. um... yeah... tired and um. yeah!! my goal is to memorize green eggs and ham!

Monday, November 05, 2001

wow.. i just re read that convo i had with that sarah bitch..... damn..i hate her. i could kill her... i could!!! I could! i would!
To my dearest, sweet erik…
Hello my lover! How are you? I’m alright. Just sitting in my English Class. I miss you so much. I love talking to you. I wish that we lived closer, goodness. Even like an hour away or something. Once I get my licence I want to be able to see you, but I don’t know if I can pull off, leaving the house for 5 hours, ya know? I wanted to write you an email, but I didn’t have time last period. Damn page maker is confuseing. Any who. Hun, dod you blink a lot? I don’t think that it is normal to blink a lot. I just watched like 5 more people and only one of them blinked a lot. Yeah. I’m weird. HunE, I really yereally liked those pics you send me. Smiles yer so hot and hunky!!! Yup! Ack I just dropped some granola bar. Speaking of that, do you eat granola. On your parfat? Yeah…I do. Hrmm… what to say. Your email to me today was so sweet. Hugs* and that kiss on my shoulder was golden. ! kisses your cheek 1 I have lunch after this class. So I will probably not eat anything else. Sighs maybe my mom or dadd will take me to get a sandwich. Those are yummy! I like mustard on them … there is a special mustard that Bread and Chocolate uses on my sandwiches. Heidi isn’t here today… RAR she has my jacket. HunE. Will you please kinda get on my case a lil about my grades.. I really need to do getter.. er better.. so my parents leave me alone…. I need a three point o. I am bored hun, I need some stimulation., you know what? At my old school…. You could use the school’s computers for anything aside from grades. Here you can’t. frowns I wish I could just go there during lunch and write to you. But that’s ok. I suppose. Wasiem is falling asleep. I tickledhis back for him, so he could relax. I’m cold babe, keep me warm…. Smiles hugs you close and tight I need to do my homework for this class… so I’m going to go now. Ibut I will talk you later…

hugs and Kiisses kisses more

Love always and forever,

Sunday, November 04, 2001

well, ! I didn't expect to see you here today. Lemme let you in on a little secret, mmmm k? I hate a spy! Honestly, they freak me out! What? Did you just call me paranoid? Jesus! A person can't just be a little carefull and have a little hate stored up... Gosh and Gee Golly... what century are we living in here? The twenty first!? Anyways, like i was saying. I hate a spy and I have figured out this really neat camera system to find out if anyone is.. well... i'll have to whisper this to ya....... *gets close to your ear* ******BANG******* *hides the body* You can never be too careful.
PassiveSinner: getting freaky deaky
Tr1pn0tiC: Sarah says i cant talk to you. You were rude to her. Bye
PassiveSinner: that's bull. and i don't believe it
Tr1pn0tiC: ookay
PassiveSinner: you're still not scott
Tr1pn0tiC: hah. youre right.
Tr1pn0tiC: quick, child.
PassiveSinner: yeah. i'm not dumb.
Tr1pn0tiC: you arent allowed to speak to scott.
PassiveSinner: why not..?
Tr1pn0tiC: i told him you were rude. he said "ok. block her. i dont really like her all that much. she has a crush on me"
PassiveSinner: because he likes me?
Tr1pn0tiC: yah he does.
Tr1pn0tiC: that is why
PassiveSinner: you're jealous
Tr1pn0tiC: i just dont like you because you were snippy. and i will use my power against you. call it what you like. and you are far away. you have no power.
PassiveSinner: bah. whatever. i know he hates talking to you and such. so i don't care. he just doesn't want to be mean to you.
PassiveSinner: he likes talking to me.. so whatever
Tr1pn0tiC: do you know who this is?
PassiveSinner: sarah
Tr1pn0tiC: k. ill have him call you tnoight.
PassiveSinner: *nods*
PassiveSinner: ok.. and ..?
Tr1pn0tiC: and nothing
Tr1pn0tiC: im done being silly
Tr1pn0tiC: i dont know you. dont care to.
PassiveSinner: that's fine and dandy by me, cuz from what i've heard. i don't care to know you either
Tr1pn0tiC: im glad scott can talk to you about stuff
Tr1pn0tiC: thats cool.
PassiveSinner: it is really. he's a great guy.
Tr1pn0tiC: you are no fun, even when given the chance. ill see to it that scott no longer speaks to you. we will have your number blocked from his line.
PassiveSinner: you know, you aren't being very kind.
Tr1pn0tiC: no. i was nice. i still am. i stopped being rude and mean when i said "im done being silly"
PassiveSinner: i care a lot about scott. and if he chooses not to talk to me... then, that's his thing. But if you have to make him not talk to me. that's just selfish.
Tr1pn0tiC: you seem not so great, really. and your rechid use of sarcasm is nothing short of annoying.
Tr1pn0tiC: i know you care for scott. he told me that you have a crush on him.
PassiveSinner: remember who started all this with.. "have we had phone sex?"
Tr1pn0tiC: he said you can be "okay" at times
Tr1pn0tiC: i told you it was me. then you were snippy and quite rude.
PassiveSinner: *wicked grin* that's not what he said...
Tr1pn0tiC: no really. thats what he said.
Tr1pn0tiC: i just talked to him
PassiveSinner: sure thang sarah
Tr1pn0tiC: and told him you were rude to me. we dont dig that behavior. even if you were to hate me
Tr1pn0tiC: if you care so muhc for scott then youd have common decency and respect. to not be rude to his friends
Tr1pn0tiC: thing*
Tr1pn0tiC: folsom has a jail. not a great grammar program
PassiveSinner: i wouldn't have been rude, if you hadn't asked about the phone sex
Tr1pn0tiC: i joke.
PassiveSinner: it wasnt' funny
Tr1pn0tiC: scott and i joke about it.
Tr1pn0tiC: so that is why i laugh.
Tr1pn0tiC: when you call we say "oh. is she craving more scotty love?"
Tr1pn0tiC: we laugh.
Tr1pn0tiC: he plays your messages for me
Tr1pn0tiC: we say "yup. shes craving some lovin'"
Tr1pn0tiC: we joke.
Tr1pn0tiC: join in onthe fun. its okay to smile.
PassiveSinner: ;-)
Tr1pn0tiC: there is your sour sarcasm again
Tr1pn0tiC: i already told you what i think of that.
PassiveSinner: and i really don't care what you think, i only care what scott thinks... if i can even go that far.
Tr1pn0tiC: what do you know of scott and sarah?
Tr1pn0tiC: have you ever met scott? or are you an online girl?
PassiveSinner: if you joke so much about me, shouldn't you know..
Tr1pn0tiC: i dont ask about you. i wouldnt know about but he plays the messages
Tr1pn0tiC: dont get me wrong
Tr1pn0tiC: we dont ridicule you
Tr1pn0tiC: and we dont make fun
Tr1pn0tiC: we simple tease at the implications of your calls.
Tr1pn0tiC: do you understand?
Tr1pn0tiC: dont go off crying thinking scotty doesnt love you.
Tr1pn0tiC signed off at 8:11:22 PM.
SARAH. OK, it's official. I hate that name, and i will never become friends with anyone named sarah. plain and simple. All the sarah's in this world are bitches. and i'm sure all the other worlds have all their sarahs just as bitchy.
Hi Ho Hi Ho It's off to work I go. Blah and such. I'm going to work and i love it , hate it. anywho.... heidi came over last night , she picked me up after work. it was really cool! *yeah* we burned cd's and such... now i'm off to take pics of pumpkins for my hw and then to work. later dayz|

Saturday, November 03, 2001

well... i was going to post a convo. but i lost the fucker. ... damn it. anywho...
james said he loves me. so that's good. i dunno... bah!!!!